The Valentine Pet

(Susanna Holstein 1.30.2004)

Note: this was written with the specific curtains we used. We had one made of blue fabric with clouds that we used for outside scenes; another was black with a window made of felt, with little curtains, etc to look like the inside of a house. The outside curtain was pinned to the top of the inside curtain and flipped up or down depending on the scene.

Scene 1: Use “inside of house” curtain

 Bobby: Boy,. It’s almost Valentine’s Day. I don’t know what to give my Mom for a Valentine’s present. Last year I gave her that big picture I drew of my dog tearing open the trash bags. She didn’t know what it was at first, but when I explained it to her, she said it was very realistic and creative. See, I made the picture using something my art teacher calls “collage.” I got pieces of the trash and the plastic trash bag and glued them right on the picture.

 Sally: Yeah, I remember that picture! It started to smell a little funny after a while, though, and Mom said we better throw it away because it was a health hazard! What a great present!

 Bobby: Well, what did YOU give her last year that was so great? Oh, I remember. It was that Atomic Bomb perfume! She was allergic to it and broke out in hives and we had to take her to the hospital. That was a GREAT present all right. I bet she never forgets that one.

 Sally: Oh, you’re a dork! I’m going to my room. So there!

 Bobby: Yanh! Baby! Go on and run, I don’t care. Silly old Sally anyway. My present was better than hers.

 Sally leaves the stage.

 Mom: Hi Bobby. Where’s your sister?

 Bobby: Um, she went to play in her room. Mom, is ther anything you really, really want for Valentine’s Day this year?

 Mom: Oh Bobby, you don’t need to get me a present! Just make me a nice card and that would be just fine. I already have so much stuff, and a card is something special to me.

 Bobby leaves the stage. Mom stares after him for a second.

 Mom: That Bobby is such a sweet boy. That picture he gave me last year really was creative. I wish I could have kept it, but the smell…..

 Mom: There’s Mrs. Lattimer across the street. That little dog of hers is so cute. It would nice to have a pet to curl up with in the evenings.  Now that Bobby and Sally are older, I’d like to have a pet around during the day to keep me company.

 (Mom leaves the stage.)  Bobby and Sally enter stage.

 Bobby: Did you hear that? She wants a pet. That’s what we can get her  for Valentine’s Day.

 Sally: What kind of a pet? Where would we get one? How would we pay for it?

 Bobby: You sure ask a lot of questions! She didn’t say what kind, I guess any kind would be all right. Let’s look in the paper. Sometimes people give away pets they don’t want.

 Sally: Good idea. Let’s find toay’s paperand see if there are any free pets listed.

Both leave the stage.

Scene 2: Use “outside” curtain 

Bobby and a man are onstage.

 Bobby: Yes, sir. I saw your ad in the paper that you had a pet to give away. I’m looking for a nice pet for my Mom for Valentine’s Day. Have you given yours away yet?

 Man: No, son, I sure haven’t. Let me show you my little Cleopatra.

 He leaves the stage.

 Bobby: Cleopatra? It must be a beautiful pet! I wonder what it is?

 Man comes back with big snake.

 Man: Here she is! Meet Cleopatra, son. What did you say your name was?

 Bobby: Uh, uh, B-B-B-Bobby! Uh, she’s really nice, Mister, but I don’t think my Mom would be very happy if I brought Cleopatra to her for Valentine’s Day. Good-bye!

 Man: She’s a great pet! She’s real quiet, and she doesn’t chew anything up or get hair all over things.

Bobby: I’m sure you’re right. I hope someone else will want her. Bye!

Bobby leaves stage in a big hurry.    Sally comes onstage.

 Sally: This ad says that these people have a nice, small, cuddly pet to give away. I wonder what it is?

 Woman comes onstage.

 Woman: Hello. Were you coming to my house?

 Sally: Yes, I saw your ad in the paper that said you had a pet to give away. I am looking for a nice pet for my mother for Valentine’s Day. May I see your pet?

 Woman. Certainly. Wait right here. I’ll go and get dear little Mortimer.

 Woman leaves the stage.

 Sally: Dear little Mortimer? This must be a nice small pet, maybe a kitten. That would be perfect for Mom. Bobby will be so jealous when I find the best pet.

 Woman comes back on stage.

 Woman: Here you are, dear. Isn’t he sweet?

 She shows Sally the mouse she is holding.

 Sally: A mouse? For a pet?

 Woman: Oh, mice make wonderful pets! They’re very quiet, and they don’t eat much, and they scare people.

 Sally: My mother is afraid of mice. She fainted last time she saw one. She fell right on the mouse and almost squashed it!

 Woman: Oh dear! I wouldn’t want that to happen to my Mortimer! I’m afraid I can’t give him to you after all. What a shame!

Woman leaves the stage.

 Sally: Mom would really be mad if I brought a mouse home. I hope Bobby found a better pet than I did.

 Bobby comes onstage.

 Sally: Did you get a pet? The one I found was a mouse! You know how Mom feels about mice.

 Bobby: Oh boy! Remember how she fell on that one? I thought all its blood and guts were going to….

 Sally: That’s okay, Bobby, sometimes I REALLY don’t want to know what you’re thinking! Anyway, did you find a good pet?

 Bobby:  Oh yeah, it was great! It was a great big snake! But I knew Mom wouldn’t like it.

 Sally: A snake! You’re right, she’d probably have to be taken to the hospital if we walked in with a snake. Some present that would be!

 Bobby: What are we going to do now? We have to find a present! Valentine’s Day is tomorrow.

 Sally: Let’s walk down to the pet store. Maybe we can get her a goldfish. I have a little money.

 Bobby: Okay. A goldfish isn’t much company, though, or very easy to cuddle with. But that’s probably going to be the best we can do.

 They walk offstage.

 Scene 3: “Outside” Curtain

 Sign at one side of the stage says “Free Puppies!”

 Bobby and Sally walk on from the other side.

 Bobby: Look! Free puppies! That’s just what we need!

 Sally: They’re probably all given away already. But let’s go ask. Maybe there’s one left.

 Man comes on with a dog.

 Bobby: Hello. Are all the puppies gone yet?

 Man: Yes, they sure are. I gave them all away this morning. I think people wanted them for Valentine’s presents or something.

 Sally: Oh dear. We wanted one for our mother for Valentine’s Day. She really wants a pet. I guess we’ll have to get her a goldfish after all.

Man: Wait a minute. This is the mother dog, and I can’t keep her either. I’m moving away and that’s why I had to give away the puppies. I hate to part with Miss Priss here, but I know she won’t be happy in the apartment I’m going to be living in in the city. Do you think your mother would like her for a pet? She’s a really nice dog, she never bites or jumps on furniture, and she loves to cuddle on your lap. Ill even give you ger dog house and bowl and leash and sweaters and toys and food and……

 Curtain comes down while he’s still talking.

 Scene 4     Inside Curtain

 Sally, Bobby and dog are on stage.

 Bobby: Do you think she’ll like Miss Priss? I sure do.

 Sally: I hope so. I’ll really feel bad if Miss Priss has to go live in a city apartment.

 Mom comes on stage.

Mom: Bobby, Sally, dinner is ready. Where on earth have you two been?

 She stops talking and stares at the dog.

 Mom: A dog! Where did you get a dog? Who does she belong to?

 Bobby and Sally talk at the same time:

 Bobby: Well, you see we wanted

 Sally: She’ll have to live in an apartment

 Bobby: we got her for you

 Sally: Valentine’s Day….

 Mom: Stop! One at a time! I think I understand, though. You’re saying that this beautiful dog would have to live in a city apartment if we don’t take her, and that you brought her to me for a Valentine’s Day present?

 Bobby and Sally: Yes, Maam.

 Mom: Thank you! She’s just what I wanted!  I think I’ll name her….

 Bobby and Sally: She already has a name, Mom. Her name is Miss Priss.

 Mom: That’s perfect! Welcome home, Miss Priss. You’re the best Valentine’s Day present ever.

 Puppets: , Old Man, Young Man, Boy, Girl, Young Woman, Old Woman, Dog, Mouse, Snake 

Props: Sign “Free Puppies!”

 Curtains: Clouds for scenes 2 and 3

Black curtain with window for Scenes 1 and 4